A Mother's Gift
What to give Mom this Mother's Day? This is the perennial question asked by those haunted by the record of humorously disastrous choices made in other years.
This year, for the first time, I won't be thinking of a gift for my mother. She has gone. She slipped away quietly a few weeks back. So now I have a chance to think of my mother's gift to me, to all her children and to the many other people who shared a piece of her life in her 87 years of being in this world.
At my mother's funeral, we saw what a gift she had with people when an entire community filled the church to celebrate her life. I hadn't had time to miss her yet so it was not a death we were mourning. Not loss but the celebration of a life well lived. She was not an Olympian in this or a Nobel-ian in that. She was simply a person who enjoyed life and made those around her enjoy their time. But she left me wit some valuable lessons:
1. The Gift of Life
Yes, this is the greatest gift our mothers gave us, not just giving birth to us but making us the unique person that we are. With all our gifts and faults, we are persons with our own unique personality, different from someone else. Something is different in us because we were given both by our own mothers.
2. My Mother's Prodding
A Tiny Effort Can Make Someone's Life Much Better
I remembered one Sunday morning when I was in my teens and full only of myself, she woke me up making me instantly grumpy. She told me that one of the old relations from the farm was down in the living room and preparing to go home after hearing Sunday Mass. My mother told me to go down there and give her money for the transpo fare. I was upset but I went down and did what she asked me to do.
Later that day, another relation came and told me that the old lady cried her heart out when she arrived at the farm. She was truly touched by what I have done. For me, it was a small effort to go down . For her, it meant not walking in the heat of the sun for hours to reach the farm. It also meant someone cared enough to think of her comfort too. I have never forgotten this lesson that many times, it only takes a tiny effort on our part to make someone's life a little better. That help, little though it was, meant far more for that old Lady. Now, when I don't feel like going out of my way to do something good for someone, I think of my mother's prodding. That's a gift from her I will never forget.
3. You are responsible for others
Make a bit of sacrifice to make everyone happy
Every year in our household, we buy new clothes for the annual gamut of important events like graduations, marriages, the town fiesta, Christmas, and Easter. When we were growing up, we went out with our mother to shop for our own clothes. Even in our early years, we were already encouraged to choose our own fabric and style.
We enjoyed this shopping expeditions except for a memory that always sticks in my mind. My mother would be choosing not for us, but for the children of those working for us. There were times when we could not get very expensive things because we must to think of the staff children for whom we had also to buy new clothes. If my mother did not do this, they would have no new clothes for these occasions.
I have to say it bugged me then but now, I fully appreciate the gift she made me understand in my early years. The responsibility of those who have a bit to those that have almost nothing.
4. Share what you value
....Not your left over
I think of this story often when, in our search for a place to live in the countries where we have our contracts, I saw refrigerators locked. My husband who is Canadian did not understand why this was done. Having lived long in Canada myself, it annoyed me.
Once I was in my second year in university, I brought friends to our house. As we were enjoying our drinks around the table, one of our workers came in, took a drink from the refrigerator and joined us in the table. I was furious but when I complained to my mother, she was surprised why I would consider it inappropriate. Her response was, you can go anywhere to eat and choose whatever you like but they can only do it in our house. They work for us and they eat what we have..
5. Skills that Made my Life Better
My mother loved to do things. She engages herself often in creating new items which fascinated us and encouraged us to learn. She taught us not to sit down but make something of our lives, of our time, of our resources.
She did it all the time so without her telling us, we did the same. This is another gift which I value from my Mother. My life would be different had I not learned this early. Instead of a winner, I would have become a loser, waiting for life to happen.
Lessons I Learned from my Mother Served me in Life
The lessons I learned from my mother, I will never forget. I have long since forgotten the colors of the clothes I bought, the toys I had (or didn't get) and the tears I had then because I was upset.
They were simple but in those teachable moments that my mother took advantage of, I learned lessons that serve me in life. These little nuggets of wisdom have dressed me better than any of those expensive clothes I was not able to buy.
Give your Mother a Unique Gift
Be a mother to someone on Mother's Day
Or a daughter to one who has made your life a little better
So, this Mother's Day, be a mother to someone. Give the gift of yourself. Appreciate the things your mother taught you and express it with the gifts you will give her. She will be a lot happier to know that you have learned so much from her and that you appreciate the gift of her own person.
I will be thinking of the many people who have no one to share this special day with them, those who have nothing to give their mothers because they can't afford anything other than food or those who have no children to think of them and make their day special. Look around you and reach out if you can. I think this is the best gift you can give a mother, especially your own.
One Mother's Day, one of our close friends' boys did a card not only for his Mom but for me, too. He thought I have no children of my own so maybe it would be nice to receive a card on this day so he gave me one. I will never forget this.
She loves all the things that make kids parties more fun especially when you let them try their hands at making the ice cream. I am sure your mother does, too. I said earlier no kitchen item but this is an exception.
So, what will give your Mom this coming Mother's Day?
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